Line Breaks, Syllables, Organization
Careful use of line breaks can alter a poem’s rhythm, tone, and meaning. The poem below is full of imagery that can be grouped and broken to change the entire feel of the poem. You might have to pull out the old dictionary to find the meaning of some of the words. As you read the poem, think about how you would change the line breaks or reorganize the words. Read the original below and then my “rewrite” is after the jump.
“Silent Poem” by Robert Francis
backroad leafmold stonewall chipmunk
underbrush grapevine woodchuck shadblowwoodsmoke cowbarn honeysuckle woodpile
sawhorse bucksaw outhouse wellsweepbackdoor flagstone bulkhead buttermilk
candlestick ragrug firedog brownbreadhilltop outcrop cowbell buttercup
whetstone thunderstorm pitchfork steeplebushgristmill millstone cornmeal waterwheel
watercress buckwheat firefly jewelweedgravestone groundpine windbreak bedrock
weathercock snowfall starlight cockcrow
My Version of “Silent Poem”
Backroad leafmold
stonewall
chipmunk underbrush
grapevine woodchuck
shadblow
woodsmoke cowbarn
honeysuckle
woodpile sawhorse bucksaw
outhouse wellsweep backdoor
flagstone bulkhead
buttermilk
candlestick
ragrug
firedog
brownbread
hilltop outcrop
cowbell
buttercup
whetstone thunderstorm pitchfork
steeplebush
gristmill millstone cornmeal waterwheel
watercress buckwheat
firefly jewelweed
gravestone groundpine
windbreak bedrock
weathercock
snowfall
starlight
cockcrow
In my reinvention, I intentionally looked at the items with a wide lense and then brought in the focus to certain elements by imaging the scene. For instance, with the lines
buttermilk
candlestick
ragrug
firedog
brownbread
I imagined someone carrying a pitcher of buttermilk, passing by the candle light to sit on the ragrug in front of the fireplace (firedog: the metal supports for logs in a fireplace) and enjoy a snack of bread and milk. The original author oriented it differently, painting the picture differently through his line breaks and organization. At the end of the poem, I specifically utilized white space (the literal white, empty space around the poem), line breaks, and line spacing to reverse my wide to narrow focus and introduce the fading of starlight and dawning of a new day (cockrow: the time when cocks first crow, or early morning). There are so many ways to “play” with this poem and each of them is unique and interesting.
As evidenced by this exercise, one of the beautiful aspects of poetry is its flexibility. You can change the entire meaning and tone of a poem through use of line breaks, organization, and white space. Don’t be afraid to experiment. Poetry gives you the freedom to throw normal sentence conventions out the window and create something all your own. Take advantage of it!





